Day 35

I haven't been missing my writing schedules but lately I have been writing other things.
Lately there have been a lot of things in my mind; perhaps heart would be a better source.
I have been missing and letting go a lot of things my entire life time, times when I had it in my arms and times when I didn't, times when all it needed was faith and patience did prevailed but patience is something that cannot be a forever thing. Every now and then you just need to get away and sometimes all you need to do is get away.
Couple months back I was lying in an open field under the starry sky and I was looking the dazzle of the night without the fear of my surroundings. There was this one pause where I couldn't even feel the stuff below me but only what was above me kept me mesmerized.
This one other time when I was just about to take a walk with my roommate and then we saw a blazing light behind us, it was coming from behind the huge trees before the big walls of our campus. We decided to go for it.
We ran
And we ran
Then we climbed all the way at the top of a 15 feet wall and sat right over it looking outside
Fields were burning and there were lines of fire dancing with the wind
We looked at each other and then we needed to be alone and we paused till eternity, everything was so slow and shiny in the dark.
Fire everywhere and darkness around it and then it began to rain. It was a time of life when god was watching it with us. Somewhere so many things were working on that frame of life we saw that night
We had our own thoughts inside us and we were thinking, looking at the fire I was thinking about my life. It's this thing that people love to explain and to put in their words but is it really that simple so that it could be explained in words? I say to myself that life isn't that simple! Anything simple can never produce magic and life can never be and shouldn't be simple.
In my time I have seen so much and heard so much but still I haven't done a thing, why would I think this way?
Why I don't let time decide?
Some say that I have done everything that one can think of but still things I have done, somewhere in my heart they were never what I been looking for. Now I'm thinking about what I really want, there is something that is blurry around my thoughts. I just don't know yet.
I'm just 21 and I think I want to be surprised by myself every day.
Just like today I was surprised by someone else.
Sometimes people give up and they do it in a second but it takes a lifetime to deicide.
Someone decided something on this day-35 and I'm happy to know.