Untitled 31 Dec, 09

It’s Thursday, December 31st 2009, last of the 365 learning days of this year. One year which I’ll always think about no matter what.
This will be the year when stories were made, people were made, puzzles were solved, mysteries were revealed, the world discovered and invented and my mind analyzed what it could grasp and then it looked deep inside and explored depths of my inner child.

As tonight pauses and tomorrow stays a mystery.............

“The devils are mad choking me with the confederate feeling
That comes from the separation of love and hate and angels, they consume inner healing
From the first breath out from the mother's womb
To the last air to the grave, besides another woman soon
Carrying hope and nothing to take but only the precedent,
A longing for another life with the curious wisdom of past, present to an end.
From right to wrong, truth to a lie, love and deceit to a smile and a cry
A man was made thru the echoes of some souls that’ll always fly
Though his heart still dark and hard like the stone not ready to melt
Their every tear for my drop of blood and the wounds that have dwelt
From the eyes of a newborn and his little happy sonnets
To the tunes of a man and his painful moments
From the eyes of angel guided by god to my eyes deflected by the devil
From an age without worries to a world in another level
From good times and togetherness to this hour and endless loneliness
Memories and shadows of all that remains that pains in the chest
To the end of our days and to another beginning with nothing to moan
When the thrill is gone, nothing will be forgotten and no one will be alone
But if only a dream and only a prayer could change the hurt
‘If’ is a part of life but a door will open if another will shut
But those were the days and these are the times
And this is the world hidden in these lines
From stories of love, pain, guilt, hate, forgiveness and lies
To what was once burned and turned into ashes and fireflies”

-Reen

Dec10, 2009

It don't even hurt but sometimes we need answers

"Pleasure turns to the pain, of the lessons learned from the strain, of the questions burned in my brain, about whether to love is humane, in its touch. These thoughts are like salmon, Swimming upstream, In the tears of your deceit, Fighting the current hurt, That kills more than is created, By the chaos of our intertwined emotions: Chaotic because the anchor of Eros' arrow has been plucked from the vessel of my undying infatuation. Separation not as simple as the distance between us, my mind no longer possessed, by the demons that had been the overseers of my enslavement to your lies. The seeds of these lies rooted so deeply, They have cracked the foundation of what we once shared, Allowing the faith in us I had sealed inside, To gush out like a river, ripping the image of our future together from my thoughts as violently and as brutally as if it were a child being taken from his mother's arms. I'm left surrounded in darkness, but I refuse to be swallowed by it, my loneliness like the night air. Invisible to the eye, oblivious to the touch, in its cold uncomfortableness. Yet if I could do it all over again, I'd do it in the same skin I'm in. To lay down and let love die, Just stay down and let love lie: No, no, not I. I'll stay 'round and let love fly, Even though I have seen its darkest form, deceit. Nothing else could taste this warm or feel this sweet."

- Big Rube

"And these thoughts connecting me with the pharaoh, his answers are mysteries of my tomorrow, I fall from the frame of time and I feel covered with sorrows and black roses, and melodies of what tomorrow can bring if I'm there with hopeless soldiers. Time gaps and world ages in the midst of an uprising where the heart and mind are cages, reminiscence of smiles with tears of old times and those yet to come as frustration rages. Sleep without dreams or feelings as soul leaves the body and dissolves, so cold outside but warm inside as the air brings back fumes of love from the womb of mothers' love where it all evolves. I see a ghost dancing when my spirit walks alone, and my steps are erased on my way back home. Under the dark grey sky it rains purple through the light, as the tears are washed away at the end of every night. I ask lord where they all departed when the time was near, the sins they committed can't be enough for me to hear. Then that angel rescues the dawn and clouds shine along, my anger for them dies slow but my silence brings them back strong."

-Reen

It'll never hurt but sometimes we have questions

Dec 5, 09

The whole world is sleeping

Every next step is a step ahead, one step forward, one step up to the stair we climb remembering that we ain't coming down and even if we don't make it to the top, we should know that we are somewhere close enough.

This world is full of things which can be simple and otherwise complex. Somebody told me recently that when god makes a good soul, a devil comes along. So where are the angels? Are they inside us or is it that some people don't know yet what they are capable of. "A change brings a change" we must never forget this.

My promise is still a solid stone and it will be engraved with a word that I'll always keep. Not many get a second chance, I just had so many chances and I think it's finally that time when something there has a spark I was looking for, something will change for good.

A dream is a dream but a light carries hope, hope in darkness. Everything always happens for a reason.

"Below the lust of the clouds and the emptiness of the sea, in the soft sand I lay hearing my inner voice but then she comes. I look at her, she sits in front of a grand piano slowly lingering her fingers on it, getting ready to play. I look at her, she wears a black dress and she has a glow of silver, her soft hands, cold feet, hazy eyes full of depth of the sea, black hair slowly moving by the breeze close by, lips pale red all strawberry and she kisses with a touch of her bubblegum tongue. Time freezes to death but then the lights fall, curtains raise, among millions to honor I find solace and hope with courage to go on. That music can only be cherished some place where the world stops. On the tip of horizon where there is fire that flames. Peace inhales love"

The whole world is sleeping and I don't want to.