Lie

I fell upon the very ground that once raised my pulse and made me a man I was before. Lie bruises deeper than flesh and bones as strong as iron crumble in seconds upon the very pillars of faith once entombed.

It is not life but death that decides its final purpose. It is not pain but wounds that define hurt. It is not love but hate that defines compassion and longing towards the same. It is not faith but trust that eludes wisdom towards its crumbling; it is faith and not trust that shatters belief.

It is obvious if the longing for something more than life is eluded by one moment of simple but yet so unobvious words: years of acumen crushes without admonition.

"As I sleep thru the dark times, only to desire rest but no sleep

Dreams yet again forcefully hollowing heart within deep

So death comes in times of prayers

As I lay my gaze upon your sight

I see thru your gaze thru the tears

And memories that were once the future

It is now the fate that cannot be changed

For once what was my crown

Now has departed to rule another kingdom

For what was once my destiny rewarded by gods

Is now my curse laid upon my worthless life

I still see that same face as love betrays my shadow

I still feel the touch as her warmth is my reason to live

I still stand beside my own people as they see what I do

Words once for me are just the rhymes of new roses

And this life as if wild and unchanged yet attached to the underworld

But then reasons, I see an image and I read Hades

I despise angels even thought they stand beside me

I despise life as thought another has to come after this

And I carry hope for the afterlife and my path to the old memories

As if I know what future holds"

The Touch

"And on came the winter and then came the spring

New breeze and flowers and then followed a dream

Soon followed the sun and then came my shade

Into my heart thru the river of fire, a flame came to invade

And then it rained and it rained hell

Clouds of grey horizons and many black nights to tell

But it rained thru the sun and it only rained blue

The world was a different place for both me and you

And then came the nightmare and then came the fall

What was once here was gone never to call

And then came a feeling, a touch made it forever

If it rained again, it will only rain for better"

-Fireflies 2010

Dreams

If life was pictured black and white then perhaps it would have been a classic but it has been colored in shades, transfusions with so many differences that sometimes it's hard to keep a check.

"Tonight I'll fly like those birds that flew away together

Tonight I'll dream as if my rules were not meant forever

Tonight I'll cover patches of some broken dreams

Tonight I'll burst like the rain without the grey themes

Tonight I'll haunt my inner ghosts with memories of old screams

But if tomorrow never comes then tonight I'll sleep in my dreams"

Fireflies - 'Reen'

You can't plan for anything; someone told me that it never works. If colors can replace the classic black, white and grey then I'm happy to be colorblind.

Someone close to me shared a poem by Percy B. Green, it's a nursery rhymes and it's beautiful.

"A man of words and not of deeds
Is like a garden full of weeds
And when the weeds begin to grow
It's like a garden full of snow
And when the snow begins to fall
It's like a bird upon the wall
And when the bird away does fly
It's like an eagle in the sky
And when the sky begins to roar
It's like a lion at the door
And when the door begins to crack
It's like a stick across your back
And when your back begins to smart
It's like a penknife in your heart
And when your heart begins to bleed
You're dead, and dead, and dead indeed"

Painted Emotions

Painted Emotions

Sun was up and everybody was tired after the day’s break but my mind was hazed with expressions of art. I stood up and I picked up a paper and a pencil and gave my thoughts an image that I wanted to transform and sketch but it was blur and not colorful and I was thinking that maybe this is a face of a man from my past, one I know who has cemented his soul in my mind.

I don’t know if he was my dad who reminded me of his books and experiences and maybe it is the fear that he has engraved in my mind.

On other thoughts, maybe it’s my mom who reminds me every moment of eating at time and reminds me of clocks, food cause it’s the connection of womb, soul and another life but same.

Maybe this face is of my sisters who depend on arguments with me all the time and this face arrived cause of a fight with them in the past.

Maybe it’s the face of my friend who is stamped in my heart because of affection and a bond that only god can exceed.

Maybe this face is of my teacher; my guru who is still shivering my bones cause of incomplete homework and the fear has entitled me of being stable.

Maybe it’s the face of some girl for whom my love has no boundaries. Maybe it’s the face of my enemy who reminds me of the hurt I passed on. But in all of this, there is something that moulds my thoughts, my art, my vision and above all, my mind. But time wasn’t on my side so I could give this image a body and a sound. This face wants to remind me of something that those people I left behind in my past are reminding me of, that I’m theirs and in them there is someone that reminds me that those who I couldn’t remember gave my thoughts and visions a feeling of their own and connected me with them.

I understood that this visionary imagination was not merely art and a conceivable face but were real people and real feelings that can only be felt by living with people carrying hope, happiness and love.

This face is in my mind and will always remain there as it is, cause this face was a path to past and a memory that has been carved in my mind cause of my heart and it’s vision has grown compassion in me for poetry.

Maybe art is something that will stay a mere dilemma in this life cause contentment that I have shared and I shall share with people will never die until I’m gone.

My Soul Bleeds

My Soul Bleeds

Someone whom you think your soul mate, walks into your life,

Friendship grows and trust develops, through all toil and strife,

Ever closer, growing fonder, on them you depend,

Then suddenly and without warning, trust is brought to end.

You find they've lied, you find they've broken all the trust you had,

So what to do when you still love them and things turn so bad?

Cry a tear, no, I cried thousands, tried to understand,

Couldn't think that this was real, it was so underhand.

In a daze, I sat an pondered all that had been said,

Surely this could not have happened, it was in my head.

Friends all told me I should leave him, that he'd always hurt,

But I couldn't walk away. He'd have to dish the dirt.

Weeks rolled by, my head was reeling from the stories told,

Placing pieces in the jigsaw, quickly growing old,

Thinking of the times he'd said he couldn't love again,

For if once more he was let down, he would feel the pain.

So, my heart says if this reason really is the rhyme,

Why do I feel that I'm outside looking in each time?

Why do all his friends know secrets that aren't told to me,

Is it that he's hiding something, not for me to see?

Why is it he thinks I should stay out here in the cold,

Why is it he had to do this... why was I not told?

Communication now is broken, not even a word

Except to scold me and to run before he can be heard.

Why with others does he taunt me, is this just a test,

Hoping that I can stop loving he whom I love best?

I guess again I have to sit and wonder why he erred,

To wonder whether others let him down and made him scared

Or was it always his fault that women walked away?

Was it him who let his loves down , he would never say.

I vowed my life to this one man and ever that will stand,

He's never told me it was over, pretended he was grand,

Faultless man, he said he needed time to have a think,

I gave him space, I gave him time and never did he blink,

He just went out and punished me with his thoughtless deeds

Two years of hurting passed now, and here my soul, it bleeds.